Why Singers Need to Create Their Own Work (Stop Waiting to Be Cast)

In this episode, Sarah challenges the idea that artists should wait to be chosen before making meaningful work. She explores why waiting for auditions, casting calls, or permission can keep singers stuck and disconnected from their creativity. Instead, she breaks down the mindset shift that happens when artists start creating their own projects and opportunities. This episode is about reclaiming agency, building momentum, and becoming the kind of artist who generates work instead of waiting for it.

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Transcript

0:03

If you are tired of not making progress and you're ready to be the artist, you know you're meant to be, you are in the right place. You are listening to the Singers Path podcast. The Path or performing artist training hub will cover everything, including singing tips that actually work, advice from top industry professionals and life-changing mindset shifts out with the starving artist and in with the Thriving Artist. I'm your host, Sarah Bishop, professional, singer, actor, educator, and entrepreneur. I am not afraid to speak the truth and stop the gatekeeping of quality information so you can actually become the artist you dream of being. So let's get on the path, shall we? Even though we're all on our own journeys, it always helps to have a guide. Hello, hello and welcome back to the Singers Path podcast. This is your host, Sarah Bishop, and I'm really happy to be back. I take a few weeks off there. Um, I'll be honest, you know, there's a lot going on. A lot happening in the world. Um, I have some stuff going on in the personal life as well, so I just really needed to take a break. So I really appreciate your patience, um, in that while I was taking a little bit of time to recover, get some space, just take a little bit off of my plate, as you can imagine. Running a business, it being audition season, you know, running multiple social media platforms and doing life stuff, traveling back and forth. It can, it can be a lot sometimes. Um, happy to do it. I'm really grateful for my life and, you know, sometimes we just need a break. We need to take. A little bit of space, so I really appreciate that, taking that, letting me take that time, I guess. Um, yeah, last time I talked to you I was recording from the jungle and I believe that was released around Valentine's Day, some, sometime around that time. So it's been a couple weeks. The Jungle episodes. Amanda was laughing. That was, it was kind of a vibe with the, uh, crickets again. I think you can notice like even the last few episodes, up until this point when I was starting to get spread really thin, I feel like I became less articulate with how I was trying to say things. So we're gonna be a little bit clearer today, have a little bit more focus here in the actual episode, and get to the meat and potatoes of what we're actually talking about. And today, I specifically wanted to talk about the ever going debate and. Unfortunately sticking point for many artists, which is as a professional performing artist, specifically in musical theater, right? That's really important distinction to make here as a musical theater artist or upcoming musical theater artist. Why do I have to make. My own work. Why is everybody and their sister, whether I'm talking to a casting office or I'm talking to, you know, a mentor or a teacher or someone that's an artist that's older than me, you know, if you're up and coming or you're just starting this journey here, why is everybody saying that the solution, the the ever encompassing solution is that? I need to put my focus on just making my own work. I've seen a few TikTok videos about this, a couple Instagram videos about this recently. I think people are particularly stressed because it is literally in the belly of audition season right now, and especially if you know you're having a pretty rough or slow audition season. Most of the time, a busy audition season is a really good place to be. Right? You like, feel like things are really working out, you're making progress. It's when it's a slow season that people start to get exasperated and they, you know, they clinging to different things and reasons why it's not working out the way that it should, or that they feel like they're not getting as many auditions as they were last year and they're comparing and then. Looking for what's wrong and why isn't it working out the way that they want it to. And so this time, like beginning of March time tends to be a little stressful and you also start to hear offers coming out, right? You, you start to see maybe some of your peers start to book some stuff and you know, as far as like the core summer stock auditions, those are fizzling out and you know, it's starting to just kinda die down a little bit. I will say one thing about audition season. I don't really think there's any such thing as an audition season. There's certainly a swell of auditions that happened in January and February and March, um, even going into April and May, honestly, but they do slow down in the summer. However, I will say the biggest job I've ever booked was in like May. In April. Right. And ev I think I didn't even get the offer until July, which is quite late. So I will say with those bigger jobs with the Broadway tours, um, Broadway shows, they don't really ha, I don't think they really have a season. Where they audition, like in audition season, it, they kind of just operate on their own schedule based off of if they need replacements or whenever the show is opening and when rehearsals for that particular production are. So I all this to say, if you feel like your audition season hasn't gone the way that you wanted it to, and you're feeling. Pretty cranky about it. Uh, dysregulated. You're feeling panicked. You feel like, you know, oh my God, am I not gonna work this year? Holy shit. I have to keep doing my catering leadering job. That sucks. I don't wanna keep teaching at the school, or I don't really feel like I like this. I didn't want a nanny. I wanted to go and I wanted to do a summer stock gig. What the heck? First of all, I wanna validate you and that everybody has slow seasons. Okay? I'm in a class with some amazing, amazing, talented. People, an acting class that I take weekly, and I think everybody's kind of experiencing a slow season right now. And sometimes like I'll see them go through dry spells and I know I like, there's no doubt in my mind they've worked on huge projects and they'll have two year dry spells. Okay? Like I've had year, I've gone a couple years at a time where I haven't worked that. That's actually pretty normal. So if this is your first audition season and you're in a panic. Okay. It's, it's okay. Right. And just know, again, there really is no audition season for the big jobs. And you're gonna get another swell. There's a little swell that usually happens in the summer. I don't remember when it's, I don't remember if it's like. End of July, there's like a couple weeks, like randomly, usually some auditions pop up, it's like midsummer. And then in October you'll get another kick before the winter comes in. Okay. So as far as that, I'm just noticing people are a little bit on edge online. Um, you know, and then it comes down to this point. When things aren't going well, you feel like you don't have control over your job or you're, you're annoyed that like the Nle babies and the rich kids and everyone are getting opportunities that you're not getting and you're, you're sitting in your frustration, you're on the hamster wheel, you are grinding yourself into the ground and someone looks at you and says, well. You just need to make your own work. That can be like shot outta the cannon, straight to a 10. As far as rage goes, when you are in a place of. Yeah, I'm not booking the way I want. I feel kind of desperate. I feel like I'm gonna lose my health insurance. I can't even pay my damn rent. I, you know, like I'm struggling and you're telling me that I'm supposed to what? Write my own musical. Right now you're telling me that it's my responsibility to get the funding to create an opportunity for myself. So I just wanted to start off that, noticing a lot of people saying this and that, that rage, that frustration. That sadness, that fatigue, that burnout, all of those things, those are super valid guys. Like that is a very understandable reaction to having to feeling this burnout and these ups and downs and being in a down cycle of this like kind of psycho crazy career. Okay, and I wanna talk about possibly some reframes. So that you can dig yourself out of these pits of feeling a bit helpless in this hamster wheel so that you can start feeling, yeah, feeling a little bit better and feeling a little bit more empowered. Okay. I've talked about this before, like energetics of auditioning, but once ends up happening, unfortunately, when you are running on empty, quite honestly, and just trying to push through and it's like this chicken before the egg situation of like. Well, I need a job to get money, but oh, I need money to actually create work for myself to get a job now, or, oh, well, in order to get happy, I, I would wanna create work, but then I, I don't have the money to create the work. I need a job to create the work. So, but I'll work my Joby job, my like. My cater waiter job because that will give me money, but then I can't actually get a job that makes me more money because then I need to be able to quit that job to take the actual gig that I want. It's just like this whole dichotomy of like a mind f over how you're gonna pay for your life, but also pay for your, um, creative projects. And so what this does to you energetically when you actually aren't, you aren't feeling fulfilled. Or even sustained fully, right? In a longevity sort of situation. In that side job, in that cater waiter job, nanny job, bartending job, whatever it is, like it doesn't feel like a joyful, sustainable, or at least tolerable option for you for the long term. What ends up happening is that when you go to these auditions for jobs, you actually want your energy, not always, and it probably depends on the person, but can sometimes come off as. A little desperate. Okay? So what can happen is if you're too much in your hole, you're just really having a hard time. You're on this whole, you're in a, you're on a treadmill in a hole, okay? What ends up happening is if you stay there too long and you keep auditioning in this place, unfortunately, you might not actually be representing yourself as well as you think you are. Right? So that's when, when we're continuing to be in this burnout hole. And we're, we're trying to play the numbers game and we're showing up over and over and over and over again to these auditions. Well, we're also exhausted and we're already depleted. Okay? So then when we're showing up in front of these casting teams for these big projects, and we're not actually doing our best work, that actually is not going to help us in the long run. And again, but it's the chicken before the egg thing. Well, Sarah, I don't, I can't afford to rest and like refill the Well, well, Sarah, I can't afford to make. The thing that's gonna artistically fill me up. Well, Sarah, I can't X, Y, Z thing. I need this job in order to do that. And that's what I'm saying, you might have to reframe, pull yourself up a little bit as the heater turns on. Thank you. New York City steam heat here. Like at that point you have two choices, okay? When you're in the audition grind hole, things are not going your way. You are so frustrated. People are telling you to do your own work, which doesn't seem to make sense. You can choose to complain about it and be upset about it, which honestly you should take time to do. You should take time to allow yourself to be upset that it's not fricking fair.'cause it's not fair. It's it's not. It's objectively sucks. Okay? So it is important that you take some time to do that, but at a certain point, if you're just telling yourself a narrative of how unfair it is all the time, what is that actually doing for you? Right if, if certain things just exist because that's the way they are, it just exists that you had a bad audition season and you're kinda sitting in the dumps and there's nothing else in your control and you feel worn out from your side job and you feel like you're not even doing good work at auditions, you can sit and complain about it or you can decide to do something different. And that starts with a reframe. The first reframe I'm gonna ask. Is if someone tells you the story of like, okay, this doesn't seem to be going for you as well as it should, and maybe you should start to do your own work, why do you feel like if that triggers you, if it triggers you because you already feel like you're doing 10 million jobs, like why do you now all of a sudden have to be a screenwriter and, and a lighting designer and a sound designer, and a director and a producer? Just to be able to do the thing you love, right? If that's activating in you and you're feeling overly frustrated, the first question I wanna ask you, and I said this in the TikTok video, the first question I wanna ask you is, why specifically would you choose to do your own work? Okay. Now, when I talked about this shame step spiral and I went on and on and on, describing the emotional t tum, tumultuous, is that the word tumultuous experience of being in this, this audition hole? Okay. Of course, I think when we hear, Hey, maybe you should do your own work, at least speaking for myself, I'm talking about the years 2017 to 2019. It was still all about actually. Doing the work so that I could get another job. And of course, we always wanna book another gig. Sure. That's that's true. However, when the focus is, oh, now I have to make my own musical, oh, I have to do a full reading. Oh, I have to do this so that I can then get on the radar of the people that I feel like have the opportunities that, or, or they're, they're holding the keys to the success that I want. That unfortunately is still actually keeping you in a like helpless state. Okay? And it did for me that I'm speaking from the experience of I'm doing this, so you see me, right? I'm doing this so that you finally can give me the thing that I want. Of course that's gonna make you feel overwhelmed and stressful. Like, fuck, I had to do this other thing now. So just so you can pay attention to me now if that's happening. I just wanna ask you the question. This is a little, this is a little coaching, a little, just, we're just uncovering some stuff here. Okay? If that's happening and you do feel that overwhelm, you do feel like you have to, like, why else would I make this work? But to get further in my career and to follow my mission and to meet my goals and all of that. I want you to write out what is the actual feeling that you wanna feel once you get the booking that you've been aspiring for. Okay. What is the actual sensation that you're going for? Say, if you were to do your own creative work, and that was to get the attention of someone and then get you to book your dream gig, what would that feel like to actually book the dream gig? Okay. That is actually usually the underlying core need or desire as to why. We feel so attached to having particular outcomes. Now, please, before I trigger the shit out of people, please understand, obviously, I know you want gigs because you need to get work and you wanna build your resume, and there are very like logical reasons, like, well, of course I wanna book a gig because I need my equity weeks. Like yes. However, like. There's something also deeper that I would just be curious if you could journal about it and just get curious, oh, maybe is there something else I'm seeking when I am trying to audition for these roles? Right? Or what am I trying to seek if I feel like I have to make. This, you know, creative project on my own. What am I trying to seek from other people by doing that? I'm gonna tell you something and I, I will speak from experience, but I think a lot of people are, you know, maybe a little bit guilty of this or they, it is just food for thought. Okay. Last year when I was doing this uncovering of, like, I, I could not let the fuck go as to why I needed, I needed to, I was telling myself, I need to book these certain gigs. I needed to happen in this way. The underlying desire that I had was to actually just feel chosen. To feel like I was like finally good enough to have a right to pursue this professionally. Oh, I need this many gigs. And like there was like this definition of success that I had. Oh, I have to be booking this many times and at this level, and I have to have this many tours and this many Broadway credits so that I feel like I've actually accomplished something or I've actually made it so. That might actually be the desire. I want to feel like I've actually made it as a professional artist. I actually wanna feel seen by casting. I wanna feel chosen by casting. Right. And that's a pretty deep layer underneath the obvious layer of like, okay, well I also need to pay rent and I also need to just live my life. Right. Sometimes people are on the, the, again, this treadmill because they're trying to seek something else, right? Especially if they're going into auditions this drained and this like out of touch with like they're aligned way of life and feeling this drained. Okay? If you're feeling exhausted from pursuing your dreams. It just might be an invitation to look at the underlying desires of why you're on the hamster wheel like this. And just be open to the possibility that there's maybe another way to do this pursuing of your dreams in a more aligned way that actually works better for you and doesn't leave you drained and is a little bit more sustainable over the long run. So you actually give yourself the, the grace and the time, and you're in it long enough that you stand a higher chance of you actually meeting the really large goals. Okay. So all this back to the actual point, which was if you are triggered when someone tells you to make your own work because you feel that that's yet another like gate kept step to actually getting the thing you actually want, I want you to get curious about your attachment to the thing that you actually want. And I want to ask you, is there a possibility in if you are maybe. Making this creative work that maybe the purpose of making your own work would just honestly be in the practice of being creative was actually just for you and for you to feel like you just have control over something for once. Right? Another insidious part of being a professional auditioning actor and singer. Is that pretty much everything's outta our control all the time. And what we can do and what we do have control over is how we rehearse and practice and take care of ourself. And then like our outlook on things and like how we show up in the room. And then that's pretty much it. Then it's like up to the higher power, you know what I mean? And the synchronicity. Honestly, it's a fricking miracle if anyone books anything, let alone straight from an audition when you don't have any connects with that theater company. Like that's actually insane with the amount of saturation of actors that there are. Like that's what I mean, like there's, there's a synchronous energy that exists when you open yourself to focusing just on doing the work. And if you're not being hired to do the work, then making yourself work not for the sake of, okay, you have to have a giant budget to put on a whole damn musical, but like you are at least like actively engaging in the thing that you love to do. Correct me if I'm wrong, but most of the people who audition now, I'm assuming, I'm assuming you started this because you liked it, right? Right. You enjoy. Singing and acting and dancing and, and all of this stuff, right? But you've lost touch with the joy of why you started to do it in the first place because then it became all about getting the job right, or I mean, heck, sometimes even getting the validation or feeling worthy of being there, right? Those things sometimes overshadow. The original love of just doing the task of the art. And so when I hear now at this point, when I hear people say, oh, you should create your own work, I, I don't look at it as, oh, I have to like put my one person play like Lala Land style and invite all these casting directors to see it. I look at as actually taking control of the narrative and putting my focus on what I actually have control over in my action. Oh, I signed up to be a professional like creative artist. Whether that's a work for hire artist or not, it is actually somewhat my responsibility to keep up the skill of being creative and practicing that skill. So if someone's not hiring me to do that. For the bare minimum, it would at least put me back in my joy and put me back in touch with the whole reason that I did this if I found some kind of opportunity for myself to exercise those skills. So for some people that might look like fricking, you know, renting a room and reading a. Script for some people that might be writing a song. For some people that might be taking a class. For some people that might be writing an album or touring or doing something crazy, but I think it would just depend on the person and their budget. And this brings me to the second thing. The second thing to consider if we're feeling overwhelmed and triggered by the question, maybe you should make your own work, is this. Are you thinking that quote unquote, making your own work has to be a big, expensive, giant project? Does it really have to be you creating a short film that you're gonna submit to a film festival? Does it have to be you producing an entire album for $10,000? Right. Does it have to be that large? Or does it just mean you're doing some kind of creative step, some kind of action step forward for yourself? Okay. I get, I used to do this to myself. Actually, the album thing was what burdened me down, I and I, because. I was snagged in step one. Oh, I have to do this job because, you know, then I'll be put on the map and then that will mean that I'll, I'll attract the thing that I actually wanted because, you know, I'm, I'm putting my effort over here. And then, then. You know, that's how Lin Manuel Miranda got his traction. And then, but then the other thing that overwhelmed me was like, oh no, well I need, I need $15,000 and I need an entire studio space to, to, to release my album. And oh my God, where am I gonna go to that money? I can't even pay rent. So I wanna just, if, if you've done that, if you have a creative idea in your head that might be a little bit bigger and you just feel like you just. Spin out in the absolute inaccessibility of it. I want you to ask yourself truly, does it have to be that expensive? Does it have to be that extreme? Right now if your brain goes well, yeah, well, if I wanna share it anywhere, then it has to be of quality. I'm gonna have to hire a team like, like I'm gonna have to ask people to come in, you know, be a DP and be a filmographer. I'm gonna have to get the producer because that's the only way that it's gonna be good. Because if I want anybody to see it, it, well, it needs to be of quality. Otherwise, it will reflect badly on me, and if I wanna use it for my reel or for my website, like I can't have anything bad up there. Okay. If that happened to you. Guys, I know your brains. I know what happens. Okay? If that happened and you started to spin out again, if we have task one, right? Instead of, oh, I have to do this thing so that I can get the attention of this person. If that task got modified to, oh, I, I just wanna do this for myself, for my own joy again, so I get myself out of this rabbit hole. Okay, so if the project's about just having fun and being enjoying and just doing the art, do we really have to be attached to it? Turning out perfectly, like. Can we be okay with it? Maybe turning out badly? Can we be okay with maybe just looking at it as a learning experience? Can we be okay with like leaning on our friends and people we love who have other skills? Right? I will tell you, okay. When you get those two things squared out that you know you're really making creative work because you want to. For you. A, because it's fun, and then B, you don't burden yourself with this giant project, but instead you look at it at one step, at a time within the budget you're capable of, and you don't blow it out to be this huge, big thing. You can do a lot of stuff. Okay. And I know, again, if what I'm saying just activates you to no degree, like that's fine. Maybe this just isn't the episode for you and, and that's fine. And, and you are just not in that space right now. I'm just gonna say, okay, when we, when we're spinning out about how unfair it is, right. Again, I've heard people be like, yeah, this is just what teachers and coaches, and this is just what, you know, casting directors, that they, they just, they don't take responsibility for the fact that, you know, someone's at their, their conservatory and there aren't that many jobs, and so they just tell them to keep busy by making their own creative work. Like how helpful is that to have that narrative, like blaming and being pissed. Like people are trying to encourage them to really take their creative power back in their hands and apply themselves in a way that brings them joy. Like if we phrase it in that way, it's pretty ludicrous to, you know, shit on the idea of ever creating your own work. Because as artists, isn't that what it's about? Aren't you always kind of creating your own work, even if you're a work for hire artist? You don't, you wanna like practice your skills, right? And so if it's out of your control that you know, these outside sources aren't providing you opportunities to practice skills, is it not your responsibility to like do something about that? Right. And again, I think if we're really honest with this, and again this sounds harsh, but I'm trying to deliver you like the big sister news that's like. The, the, the truth that I have seen for so many people. I think what we gain from blaming others and being pissed about the system, and again, not saying that the, the system's not fucked up. It is okay, it is rigged in a shitty way. Right? There are people that have unfair advantages. There's people that never have to work. There's people that. You know, their daddy has a connection. There's people that there's, and, but that doesn't matter because it comes down to what is your choice and how you are gonna handle it. Are you just gonna choose to be pissed at how it is all the time? Or are you gonna, you know, I don't know, choose to live your life in a way that brings you joy, right? That's just a lot of like brain calories and life to live. Pissed. And if I could go back. And like, I don't know, give my, I throttle myself a little bit, but like also give myself a hug at that time where I'm explaining like, these total spinouts, like I absolutely would. And I would say, Hey, listen, I know you're in pain right now because it feels so outta control and you feel like you really do need these things. What if this actually was, I mean, again, this sounds actually kind of insufferable, but it's true. What if this was just an invitation? To see how savvy and how capable you are and how you know, how strategic you get and how smart you get when you are. You only have so many resources and you have to lean on your creativity and you lean on your friends and, and you kind of are forced to learn some new skills. Maybe this is a beautiful opportunity to actually have some fun, like discovering how to do these things. Um, maybe these are skills that you're gonna learn that might end up making you a lot of money in the long run, right? Or you can lean on or maybe you uncover some passions that you didn't know were there and all of that, right? All because you actually stopped listening to the blaming. To the sitting there a little bit to the victim mindset, right? The, the feeling of helplessness, right? And you started to choose, hey, maybe I do have some things in my control. One of which is prioritizing my own creativity, making time for that, and actually making things. Okay. Again, this is just such a layered subject. I think I did a pretty decent job of getting like a punchy, like five minute version of this on the Instagram and TikTok that I released, but there's just so, so, so, so, so many layers, guys, and I, you know, another thing that really is at play here, beyond like wanting to be chosen. Right, and feeling like, oh, now we have to do this other thing to be chosen to get on the radar to compete. Another thing can actually be, again, that fear of visibility, like I said. So say you actually, you actually do get the funds to make the thing, right? We're talking about that perfection piece. Um, that hopefully you, you just choose to be creative at all. It doesn't have to be the most expensive, you know, stage reading, or you don't have to do the full short film. You know, you don't have to hire out a complete production team for $20,000. Maybe you could just do it with you and your friends. Well, if it comes time to actually share the thing, that can actually also flare up a fear of visibility, right? All of this, all of this like stacking like excuses and reasons and X, y, Z thing as to why it's so hard and why you can't do it. All of these reasons, you will always have a justification as to why you can't prioritize. Something that you're resisting to do. Okay. Or over why you can't prioritize. Um. You know, making it easier for yourself. Right. Our brains are so sneaky, our subconscious is so sneaky. Like a lot of this kind of nervous system shut down overload. And these like spin outs that we experience is actually a way that we can subconsciously, like keep ourselves the same and keep ourselves in this loop. Because even consciously, if we, if we don't wanna be on this hamster wheel, we don't wanna feel like we're not enjoying pursuing our dream. We don't wanna feel. Stuck at our bartending job. We don't wanna feel like we're, you know, not getting anywhere with auditions and that we feel crippled by the financial situation, that we can't make anything creative or that we don't have the budget to actually pursue something. Of course, we don't consciously wanna be there, but. There might be something happening subconsciously that's keeping you in that loop. Unfortunately, it probably is going to take some action that is different from how you've been previously operating in order for you to kind of move the needle from where you currently are. Okay? And the subconscious and the nervous system is gonna kick the fuck in because that's their job. Their their job is to keep you alive. Okay? And if you've been functioning this way for a really long time, okay. Whether you know it's earlier in your life or whatever. And all of a sudden someone's, you know, offering you to do something different that feels outside of your comfort zone. Well, of course you're gonna wanna recoil. You're not gonna wanna share it. You're gonna want it to be perfect. You're gonna wanna control all the outcomes. You're gonna wanna, you know, hide and shrink and, like, feel embarrassed. There's, there's gonna be about 10 things that kick in no matter what. Okay. And, um, it's just, it's just kind of wild. So I, I guess we're gonna, we're gonna wind down here as I'm just basically going through what it. What this experience is of resenting deeply whenever anyone says, like, we should just make your own work. Yes. A you have a right to be frustrated'cause it's fucking hard. Okay. But b, if you are able to reframe, Hey, instead of thinking that I actually have to do this in order to get work right. I, I, now I have to write my one person play because that's the only way the casting director will notice me. Okay. Maybe a deeper purpose for you doing this creative work. If we can reframe this is to do it for you and do it for your joy. And guess what? Okay. This is where the kind of reverse psychology comes in, which is the wild part about it and the energetic manifestation you part about it. We all hear, I think this is where the wires get crossed. Oh, we all hear that. When that one person stopped focusing auditions and then they started pouring themselves into their own work, well then the opportunity came. So sometimes we can think like, oh, well if I just do my own work, then that's automatically going to attract the opportunity. But there's one piece that's missing. You have to detach from needing that specific outcome. If you're doing the one person play and the work or the movie so that you can still seek the validation or get the specific thing that you're attached to that is not necessarily gonna work, you have to detach and let go of it working out in a certain way and pour your focus back into your joy, right? Like I said, and when you recommit to that, that's when you become magnetic. Okay, because your focus is actually on the whole reason you started to do this in the first place because you fricking love it. And guess what? Just think about it for a second. How many of us know someone that is just loving life? And is just always in a good mood and is a ray of sunshine and is just so smiley and loving and open and just, you know, just slurping it up. Right? Like we all know a couple people that are just absolute rays of sunshine that are so joyful, okay? They're magnetic, attractive people. Like there's just something about them that like draws you to them, right? They're like when the vibes are high, because you're doing creative self-care and you're actually doing things that let you up. Not only is your whole life just gonna kind of feel better, you're gonna feel like you have a sense of purpose and you're gonna maintain and, and kind of reframe the control that you have over your own life and your own joy instead of putting it outside of yourself, which is what people are still doing when they're begging and needing these jobs. Uh, and again, outside from the objective, like obvious reasons, like there is this subconscious need and desire you're putting. Things outside of you. When you reclaim it and you go, I'm gonna do this for me, I'm gonna do this because this puts me in joy. I'm gonna do this just'cause I fucking love it. I'm gonna, I'm gonna make sure that I'm tending to my love. Okay? That makes you glow and sometimes that actually draws. Then after you've detached, it draws things to you. So that's why people end up. Like sometimes getting offers because they have detached. Okay, so there's both, right? It's reclaiming the control over your own narrative, the control over your own creativity. And the second thing is, yeah, don't, don't watch a sneaky brain for that overwhelm. Oh, well now it has to be expensive. And with what money? No one said it had to be expensive. Boo. No one said it had to be expensive. I will tell you it cost me $100. That is it to film. A video of me singing what Baking can do from Waitress. I got, um, there's this place called FD Studios, or FP Studios, I can't remember. In Astoria. I rented a room and it was like a film, it's like a photography space, but they had like a film set with a kitchen. I brought my own mixer and my own flour dough that was dry as hell. I filmed a music video. I recorded myself singing with a audio track that I bought for like$15 and bought the rights for, and my sister did me a solid and edited it and mixed it, and I, you know, did this music video on my iPhone. I edited it myself. That was, you know, a difficult process, but I learned some stuff and I released it. I was scared as hell, but it actually turned out. Good. Pretty. And it was a hundred dollars. Okay. You could rent a studio at Pearl and read a script. You could find a score online probably for free, and play through it with friends. You could, I don't know, do like, we hired a friend, um, last year. This was another I, I did another project that was mine that was literally the most fun I've had all year, where we had a friend who was like, their specialty was stage combat. They taught us stage combat in Central Park and we split it and paid them to teach us this other scale. It was so fun. And then we, my other friend wrote a scene and then we filmed it. At a park near her house and now it's taking a while, but her and I are learning to edit and we're going, I'm going to her house on Sunday and we're going to, unfortunately have to dub over the sound. We have to record the sound later because we did not have the mics, but I'll tell you what. Okay. It actually looks pretty good. And it was a way for us to practice acting on film and, um, even if this sounds bad, like okay, it was a blast. Okay? And I will tell you, especially when I've poured myself into my business and into these projects and into pri, into prioritizing relationships and joy and like writing again, like I've been writing, um, since the beginning of the year, I've written two songs that I hope to release here soon. Um, after they're finished being produced. But after that, I will tell you, I, I hadn't booked for over a year. I got two offers this week, which is crazy, but I, I was so detached from the outcome I didn't. Care. You know, I mean, I, it would've been nice, right? There was, there was true detachment. Like, oh, this would be nice if I could do this gig. I feel like I would really enjoy this creative process, but if it's not for me, that's okay. Like I'm only open to the things that are actually for me, and I've created this life for myself. With a lot of work, and I mean its own set of burnout and its own set of trials and tribulations, but so that I can like have the privilege of that detachment compared to 2019 when I would've been frothing at the mouth out of desperation of, please, please, please, please, please gimme this job. I created a life for myself that I could thrive within. And so kind of the jobs and the opportunities that come my way are like this gravy that I just get to enjoy, right? So all that to say like, just ask yourself like, are you getting triggered by that? And could it be actually an invitation to take control over the narrative of your own joy? Does it have to be a big deal? Are we just overwhelming ourselves and making excuses? And, and if it really also comes down to you just don't wanna make your own things, like you just wanna be a creative work for hire, then again, fine. But you're gonna need to practice your skills somewhere. If you're not being hired, then like join a class or something like God, like what? Are you just gonna sit there and not sing or not act for like two years? Like you're probably gonna need to practice too, just to be competitive in the auditions when they come up. All this is say I care about you and I see you. Truly. Okay, I can relate. 10 outta 10, 100% was literally living that life was in the same position. Like, I get it. I, I understand how devastating. It's how, like, I remember feeling embarrassed and so, so, so stuck and, and this feeling of helplessness, it was like. Oh my God. It feels like my dream is completely out of my hands. And if that's happening to you again, the, the creating your own work or making content, whatever, whatever avenue you wanna go with it. It's not meant to make you feel more debilitated and more helpless, it's actually trying to show you, shine you away outta your hole using your creativity. Okay, with all that, I just wanna say I love you, I care about you. Um, if you love the podcast, um, don't forget to leave us a five star review. We do a drawing. I don't know if it's gonna be consistently quarterly, but it's turning into quarterly. I'm actually doing another drawing July, or sorry, not July, March 10th, and I'll be. Drawing that winner on TikTok live, I believe on March 10th. Um, but basically if you write us a five star written review, take a screenshot of it on Apple Podcasts and you send it to the email singers path@gmail.com, then we enter you to free win a free voice lesson with me. And it's super great, but I love to give back to listeners, anyone listening. Um, and so that's why we do that. Um, now all that to say, I hope you have a wonderful rest of your evening. If you feel overwhelmed. Buy it all again. Another free resource is the Abundant Artist Audio Series. I think that should be linked below. That's another good way just to get your head in a good brain space, um, especially before auditions so that you can perform your best. Um, there's also some other really, really, really good ones to just help make this process feel a little bit easier and a little bit more manageable. Um, I see you, I really do hope you're having the audition season of your dreams. But if you are not, I'm giving you the biggest hug. And I just want you to know that it is gonna be okay, and maybe this is an invitation to own your creative power. Even if that feels crazy right now, what's one small thing you can do to do that creative self-care and let your, let yourself do something you love, even if it's on a small scale. All right, I will talk to you later. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your night. Goodbye. If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a five star written review on Apple Podcasts. This helps me get this information out to more artists all over the world. Let's work together to spread the joys of music. Until next time, I'm your host, Sarah Bishop, signing off. From the Singers Path podcast. Thanks for listening.